The Ritual Circle of Personal Pleasure and Practice
(AKA Orgasmic Yoga)
What the heck is Orgasmic Yoga?
It’s not “yoga” in the sense that you stand in different stretching positions to reach climax. One of a number of definitions of the word “yoga” is simply “practice.” Therefore, Orgasmic Yoga is the practice of generating sexual energy and pleasure. Shame often flourishes in secrecy and isolation. Unfortunately, self-pleasuring is such a private and solo experience in our culture that it is easy to harbor shame surrounding this innocent act and sometimes we aren’t even aware of it. So why hide? This ritual is an opportunity to experience a higher degree of unconditional acceptance and therefore more pleasure simply by doing your “thang” in the presence of a group of people doing the same “thang.”
What are the benefits?
What does it feel like when you accomplish something really important to you and the loved ones around you celebrate your accomplishment? It feels great, and it can bring about a greater sense of confidence and value to your wellbeing! Wouldn’t it feel great when something you really love and value is affirmed and accepted by the community that surrounds you? In effect, that’s what this ritual is all about. As a sexologist, I have been amazed to see how this kind of ritual helps in aiding the release of shame away from masturbation and therefore brings greater positivity, health and wholeness to your sexuality. Sure, it might sound weird, or “What’s the big deal (don’t guys have circle jerks all the time)?” But when done in a respectful, ritualized experience, the potential for sexual healing and positivity in your body, mind and spirit, is very rewarding indeed! Further, we are finding when groups of people practice this regularly, the changes in sex positivity can be immense. The potential to expand pleasure in this unique manner is an experience like no other.
Is this really just for voyeurs/exhibitionists?
Orgasmic Yoga is an individual experience in a communal erotic setting. It is not just a voyeuristic experience, in that we do not participate simply to derive our arousal from looking at what others are doing. The focus is for you to be in touch as much as possible with the pleasure your own body can generate, and to connect with that pleasure as fully and without shame as possible. It is not our stance in the room to “feed” off of another’s experience (although we naturally gain from everyone’s presence) but our stance in the room is to support and affirm your own unique pleasure, and we do that by showing up and being faithful to our own pleasure. Still, of course, the visual can be amazing, and there’s nothing wrong with giving a glance of affirmation, or saying with your eyes “I see you, sexy!” But in general we like to say, “we try to maintain ‘soft gazes,’ “ so that no one feels particularly “stared at” or on the spot to “perform.“
What if this brings up or triggers issues for me?
The way the ritual unfolds allows for you to give yourself consent every step of the way. No one will be touching anyone else. You are in charge and in control of your own space and pleasure. If, for you, it is not “happening,” you simply get to stop and respectfully wait for the experience to end while supporting others with your presence. Most people at some point undress to one degree of nudity or another. Again, you decide how vulnerable you will be. Sometimes people show up and they maintain their entire practice under a sheet or blanket – it’s all good! We are all in different places in our journey and this ritual, if you allow for it, will meet you right where you need to be. Still, sometimes this deep communal pleasure experience can bring up unexpected emotions and memories. If you need help, there will be more than one person, including the facilitator, trained to support you – just let us know.
What to bring:
– Yoga Mat, Pillows, sheet, towel, blankets – whatever you need to create your own sexy “nest.”
– a towel for your own personal splash zone
– something to cover yourself if you feel like it; a second blanket, a robe.
– & your favorite lube, sex toy, blind fold! (Cocoanut Oil is usually provided)
– Whatever you need to generate you unique state of pleasure!
More reading about OY:
***I want to thank, Sexologist Dr. Vixenne, for her content and paving the way for me to learn more about OY. sexologistvixenne.com